Love Letter #6 ~ The Struggle

Dear Fashion,

Here we are again where our relationship is being tested. I'm not sure how much I can take of this but, there is something about you that I can't give up on. I don't know if it's the fact that you are all that I know and all that I want to know or I must love to suffer. Taking time away from you helped me to see that there is so much we can do together, so much we can be but, sometimes it feels one-sided. I thought by taking a different approach with you would help us to grow. Or, maybe I thought it would just be an easier way to deal with you.

I have to admit that I do feel little urges now and again that are brewing inside of me to sketch again and to sew again and it kind of feels good. I'm beginning to miss that part of our relationship. I try not to watch what others do but I see how others think they know you so well that they can call themselves a fashion designer by stitching two pieces of spandex together or think that they are a stylist by throwing fabric on so called models and they continue to mock you and humiliate you but yet you keep shutting me out. The one who has loved you from a little girl. The one was professional trained. The one who eats, sleeps, and breathes you.

My good friend told me the other day that, maybe our mission is to only help others...and that kind of made me sad. Not that I dont love helping others but, I just wish that for once it was me. I just want to publicly share my love for you. I want to finally be able to see that all my hard work for the past 17 years wasn't for nothing. I just want to love you with no complications.  I'm still going keep fighting for us to make it and try not get too overwhelmed while doing so until you officially say it's over.

Loving you unconditionally,
E.